(fiction) The Conquests of Jacob Ferguson, Part 5
The next day, I asked each of the ladies (except Ava who already told me, and Suzi, who's wedding we were already planning) what they wanted if they were the ones having a wedding; if they were the bride. I tried to be subtle about it, it wasn’t too hard as we were actively planning a wedding, I expected that conversations would already be on the subject (or that I could steer them that way)
At breakfast, Claire was looking at a bridal magazine, I passed her a cup of coffee. “Sugar?” I offered, she nodded, absorbed in the magazine. “Remember prom? How you laughed at everyone who treated it as dress rehearsal for their wedding day? What did you want yours to be like?”
“Hmm? At the time, I scoffed at all the drama, the theatre, the schmaltz. It seemed to be just a show, y'know fake. I couldn’t imagine having a ‘traditional’ wedding and putting on a performance like the popular girls did at prom. I remember thinking that when I get married, I wanted an ‘anti-wedding’.”
“You mean, wear black? like have a ‘goth’ wedding? Or did you want to wear a tuxedo?”
“No, that would just be a different kind of pretension. My wedding would give the whole industry a poke in the eye, we’d spend no money, have no ‘show’.” She said as she dismissively flicked the magazine she was holding. “Since then, my attitude's evolved, I know now that some people sincerely love this stuff, so good for them, and it is fun to be a part of planning. I’m actually looking forward to wearing a bridesmaid dress. But, I think part of me still wants to thumb my nose at tradition”
“How so?”
“When I went to my cousin’s wedding a couple of years ago, it made me think that it would be a hoot to have a ‘Vegas’ wedding, still acknowledge that the show isn’t for me, by having a campy ceremony. You know, not pretend it is a show, but make it a show. Wear a tacky dress and have the groom wear an out of date pastel tuxedo, Elvis would officiate.”
“Sounds like fun.”
"Hey, Jakey?"
"Yes?"
"Since you brought it up, how come we didn't... on prom night?"
"We weren't even dating, how could I make a pass at you? That certainly wasn't my intent when I asked you to go to the dance."
"I had that in mind when I agreed to go, well I hoped, but I don't think you even noticed the signals I was sending."
"I noticed, but the truth was I was afraid of becoming your boyfriend. I was afraid that if we became lovers it would jeopardize our friendship. I thought If we went there, then ever broke up, like I broke up with Deedee, I'd lose my best friend. I couldn't risk it, so I tried to ignore your 'signals', I played dumb. I'm sorry, I should've just talked to you about my worries. I was still a kid and I've been told I'm dense."
"Okay, I'll grant you that you're dense. How about we get a 'do-over'? Let's go upstairs and pretend it's prom night? That signal clear enough?"
"Loud n' clear, but that would make you late for work, how about tonight? "
"You're a meanie, now I'll be distracted all day."
"I am not mean, I just want you to have something to look forward to; prom night should be special. Do you want dinner and dancing? A corsage? Should we get a hotel room? Let's take our time. I want to make it up to you, our prom night wasn't what you wanted it to be."
"Ha! that shows how much you know about high school boys, they never 'take their time', they're so excited to actually be with a girl that... well 'quick' would be generous!"
"I can't make any promises, I'm pretty excitable"
"Humble-brag much? cut it out, you've already won me over, and, I don't need the preliminaries, we can skip to the good stuff." She consulted something on her smartphone: "Thirty-eight to fifty-four minutes with Trixie. I am assuming some fore-and after play is mixed in there, let's see if we can do better. Tougher to tell with Ava, but she's pretty excitable at times, no?"
"I've never checked the clock, and I don't 'kiss and tell'."
"You don't need to, thin walls, remember?" She gulped down the last of her coffee, "I hope our housemates are heavy sleepers, I'm looking forward to tonight!" She glanced at the clock on the wall. "I'm going to be miss the bus..." She grabbed a slice toast from my plate, kissed my cheek, and ran for the door. I started cracking up. She stacked up so many manga stereotypes just then: my childhood friend was running for the bus with a piece of toast in her mouth. If she would just wear sailor fuku (see note 1)…
....
Shortly after lunch, I found Beatrix working in the front yard.
“How’s my pixie, Trixie?”
“Stinky, pulling weeds is sweaty work.”
“I’ll stand upwind then. Have you thought about what we discussed the other night?”
“Yes, I want to be the ‘meat’ next time”
“Ok, but what about the other thing, have you thought about what you want?”
“I want you to take a shower with me and scrub my back”
“Ok, what about a wedding?”
“Oh, that, I like Ava’s idea, but not on a beach, we'll go to the Cliffs of Moher, they’re beautiful.”
“Ok, It’s a date. When do you want that shower?”
“Five minutes, but I’ve changed my mind, scrub my back in the bath. I’ll wash the stink off and then join you there, go get the tub ready.”
....
Later that afternoon I chatted with Karin, she had just ended a phone call with her folks, when I asked her about her ideal wedding.
“Ok, but what about the other thing, have you thought about what you want?”
“I want you to take a shower with me and scrub my back”
“Ok, what about a wedding?”
“Oh, that, I like Ava’s idea, but not on a beach, we'll go to the Cliffs of Moher, they’re beautiful.”
“Ok, It’s a date. When do you want that shower?”
“Five minutes, but I’ve changed my mind, scrub my back in the bath. I’ll wash the stink off and then join you there, go get the tub ready.”
....
Later that afternoon I chatted with Karin, she had just ended a phone call with her folks, when I asked her about her ideal wedding.
“Kay-chan, are your parents looking forward to the visit?”
“Oh yes, they haven’t seen Tsubaki or I in a while, and of course they are excited about the wedding. Kaa (Mom) is a little disappointed that she doesn’t get to show off her daughter to the neighborhood, Papa thinks it is great that he doesn’t have to pay. Plane fare is cheap compared to a wedding “
“What about you?”
“I’m very happy for the both of you.”
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t clear on what I was asking. Did you want a western style ceremony? I mean when you thought about getting married, before?”
“You know me, I’m old-fashioned.”
“Yea, you’re a regular Yamato Nadeshiko (see note 2), is there a naginata (see note 3) in your dowry bundle? “
“What about you?”
“I’m very happy for the both of you.”
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t clear on what I was asking. Did you want a western style ceremony? I mean when you thought about getting married, before?”
“You know me, I’m old-fashioned.”
“Yea, you’re a regular Yamato Nadeshiko (see note 2), is there a naginata (see note 3) in your dowry bundle? “
She gave me a stern look, “You know better… But, I always thought I’d have a ceremony at the neighborhood shrine, traditional”
“Are you disappointed?”
“Not really, I gave up on that when I took my current job, I knew I likely wouldn’t be living in Japan. I didn’t think about getting married any other way. It wasn’t a ‘big deal’ for years, just seemed very ‘far away’, something I’d do when I settled down.”
....
“Are you disappointed?”
“Not really, I gave up on that when I took my current job, I knew I likely wouldn’t be living in Japan. I didn’t think about getting married any other way. It wasn’t a ‘big deal’ for years, just seemed very ‘far away’, something I’d do when I settled down.”
....
I knew I'd be walking on eggshells when I asked Deirdre. She got a divorce shortly before she ‘retired’.
“Deets, do you have time to talk? I mean you’ve been through a wedding ceremony before…”
“…” She looked at me but didn’t respond.
“I’m sorry, that was insensitive of me, are you ok talking about this?”
“It is alright, that is a ‘closed chapter’ of my life, the wedding itself was very nice, the marriage, not so much.”
I gave her a hug. “I’m sorry…”
“What was your question? I don’t mind, it’s ok”, She asked, still in my arms.
“Actually, I was feeling a little overwhelmed. Everything is moving so fast. It was only a few weeks ago that getting married seemed like something in my future, I mean something I’d do someday. And before I knew it, my life is fuller than I ever imagined, my head is spinning. I don’t think I’m nervous about the ceremony... I just have concerns. Everything is suddenly getting very real, and I thought that since you’ve …”
“Really, honey it’s ok.” She said. She hugged me back. “You know, sometimes you’ve just got to let yourself be taken care of, you don’t have to do everything yourself. From time to time, it’s ok to just enjoy the ride…”
She then kissed me, I think I saw fireworks.
“Wow, I didn’t realize how much I’ve missed you. I love you. Never leave.” I kissed her back. “I mean it, never leave, I want you in my life, forever. Do you want a fancy wedding? I’ll walk down the aisle with you. What do you want, Deets?"
“You just offered all I want, I’m in your life forever, you’re in mine. You love me, I love you…Is that what you were so worried about?”
“I’m new to this ‘proposal’ thing, how did I do?”
“Not bad, better than the last one I got, you get extra points for sincerity.”
“Is that a ‘yes’?”
“I already said ‘yes’, the other day, after you ‘reeled me in’”
“You said ‘yes’ to a PowerPoint sales presentation for a timeshare, and I’m thrilled about that. I also want you to marry me, and I want to know if you want a wedding or not, we’ll have one if you want.”
I gave her a hug. “I’m sorry…”
“What was your question? I don’t mind, it’s ok”, She asked, still in my arms.
“Actually, I was feeling a little overwhelmed. Everything is moving so fast. It was only a few weeks ago that getting married seemed like something in my future, I mean something I’d do someday. And before I knew it, my life is fuller than I ever imagined, my head is spinning. I don’t think I’m nervous about the ceremony... I just have concerns. Everything is suddenly getting very real, and I thought that since you’ve …”
“Really, honey it’s ok.” She said. She hugged me back. “You know, sometimes you’ve just got to let yourself be taken care of, you don’t have to do everything yourself. From time to time, it’s ok to just enjoy the ride…”
She then kissed me, I think I saw fireworks.
“Wow, I didn’t realize how much I’ve missed you. I love you. Never leave.” I kissed her back. “I mean it, never leave, I want you in my life, forever. Do you want a fancy wedding? I’ll walk down the aisle with you. What do you want, Deets?"
“You just offered all I want, I’m in your life forever, you’re in mine. You love me, I love you…Is that what you were so worried about?”
“I’m new to this ‘proposal’ thing, how did I do?”
“Not bad, better than the last one I got, you get extra points for sincerity.”
“Is that a ‘yes’?”
“I already said ‘yes’, the other day, after you ‘reeled me in’”
“You said ‘yes’ to a PowerPoint sales presentation for a timeshare, and I’m thrilled about that. I also want you to marry me, and I want to know if you want a wedding or not, we’ll have one if you want.”
“Yes, I’ll marry you, I’ve already had a fancy wedding, I don’t need another ceremony. Suzi will be mad if she finds out I wed you first, but in my mind, we just did. Your proposal is all I need, if you don’t need anything else from me…” We kissed again. “We’re married; you just kissed the bride. I’m looking forward to our wedding night, but, I promised Suzi to ‘get in line after her’. The anticipation is fun too, like when we were in high school, and I was anxiously waiting for you to work up the nerve to ask me to go ‘all the way’.”
“I think our memories differ, I remember you making the first move”
“A delicate flower such as myself? Never. You may not have formally asked me, in so many words, but I knew when you worked up the nerve. I just let you know I was willing.”
“Sophistry! how could you undressing me be anything but initiating?"
"That was the first time you came prepared to a date. That's how I knew you were ready, I had been looking for signs for weeks. Once you 'asked', I yet you know I was willing, by taking off your pants. You can be dense sometimes, subtlety doesn't always work with you."
I was at a loss for words, I couldn't refute any of it however. "What would you have done if I decided to carry one in my wallet instead? How did you know I was 'ready' and not just hoping that someday I'd get to use it?"
"You didn't have one in your wallet? I thought all responsible minded teenagers had one on them always, heck I kept one in my purse. That night, you had yours in your front pocket, that indicates 'intent to use', was I wrong? did I rush you?"
“Responsible teenager? The phrase is an oxymoron. No, you didn’t rush me, your intuition was correct. What a fond memory, sometime after the ‘wedding night’ let’s repeat that date. “
"Maybe not in every detail, please? "
"Are you criticizing my performance? I was a nervous teenager with a willing, gorgeous partner. I'm surprised I lasted long enough to put on a condom, never mind actually use it."
"Not that, silly. When we did the deed for the first time, I was an inexperienced teenager too, and you certainly improved with practice. What I mean is; now, I'm on the pill. We've never made love without a raincoat and I'm looking forward to it!"
....
I successfully gathered my 'intel' and started doing some shopping. I determined it would take a few days to get everything together, and figured that I could make my little presentation at the 'family meeting' we had planned for Friday night.
Notes:
1) Sailor Fuku: Schoolgirl uniform, popular in anime and manga. Style based on old-fashioned sailor uniforms from late 19th early 20th century. Formerly common in Japan for all school-aged girls, now only among middle schoolers (12-14 years old, or 6th to 8th grades) Still popular among cos-players.
2) In Japanese popular literature, ‘Yamato Nadeshiko’ describes a noblewoman of the traditional (Neo- Confucian era, 18th century and before) Japanese ideal.
3) A weapon, specifically a pole arm. The women in a samurai’s household were capable of defending the house, Yamato Nadshikos have 'cores of steel'. A naginata is the weapon a samurai’s daughter would be trained in.
“I think our memories differ, I remember you making the first move”
“A delicate flower such as myself? Never. You may not have formally asked me, in so many words, but I knew when you worked up the nerve. I just let you know I was willing.”
“Sophistry! how could you undressing me be anything but initiating?"
"That was the first time you came prepared to a date. That's how I knew you were ready, I had been looking for signs for weeks. Once you 'asked', I yet you know I was willing, by taking off your pants. You can be dense sometimes, subtlety doesn't always work with you."
I was at a loss for words, I couldn't refute any of it however. "What would you have done if I decided to carry one in my wallet instead? How did you know I was 'ready' and not just hoping that someday I'd get to use it?"
"You didn't have one in your wallet? I thought all responsible minded teenagers had one on them always, heck I kept one in my purse. That night, you had yours in your front pocket, that indicates 'intent to use', was I wrong? did I rush you?"
“Responsible teenager? The phrase is an oxymoron. No, you didn’t rush me, your intuition was correct. What a fond memory, sometime after the ‘wedding night’ let’s repeat that date. “
"Maybe not in every detail, please? "
"Are you criticizing my performance? I was a nervous teenager with a willing, gorgeous partner. I'm surprised I lasted long enough to put on a condom, never mind actually use it."
"Not that, silly. When we did the deed for the first time, I was an inexperienced teenager too, and you certainly improved with practice. What I mean is; now, I'm on the pill. We've never made love without a raincoat and I'm looking forward to it!"
....
I successfully gathered my 'intel' and started doing some shopping. I determined it would take a few days to get everything together, and figured that I could make my little presentation at the 'family meeting' we had planned for Friday night.
Notes:
1) Sailor Fuku: Schoolgirl uniform, popular in anime and manga. Style based on old-fashioned sailor uniforms from late 19th early 20th century. Formerly common in Japan for all school-aged girls, now only among middle schoolers (12-14 years old, or 6th to 8th grades) Still popular among cos-players.
2) In Japanese popular literature, ‘Yamato Nadeshiko’ describes a noblewoman of the traditional (Neo- Confucian era, 18th century and before) Japanese ideal.
3) A weapon, specifically a pole arm. The women in a samurai’s household were capable of defending the house, Yamato Nadshikos have 'cores of steel'. A naginata is the weapon a samurai’s daughter would be trained in.
Comments
Post a Comment